Elan, Emry & my nephew Judah, 7, 3 & 4 years old, Cardiff-by-the-Sea, August 2014
The beach is my happy place. Being where the land meets the sea turns a good day great, lifts me up if I am feeling down or tired or head-spinny or harassed, and gives me perspective if I am lacking it.
My nephew Bowie pulling Emry
Usually these days, beach time is accompanied by a gaggle of boys.
Bowie, littlest of the gaggle, 1 year old & seriously adorable
Occasionally Mikhail and I sneak down alone for a quick dip and a dinner involving tropical-style cocktails.
And recently, I'm rediscovering the joys of stealing a little time alone at the ocean. Last night I went in for a dip just past sunset, then showered off and joined a friend for dinner.
Ah, summer at the beach, nothing better.
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Orr Hot Springs, November 2013
As soon as I became a mother, I starting hearing advice that I needed to be sure to take “Me Time.” Bleary-eyed with milky exhaustion, occupied 24/7 with learning how to care for a newborn, I nodded at what sounded like wisdom, but I didn’t really know what it meant.
Personally, I hate the phrase “Me Time.” It sounds so upper class, so privileged, so optional. For me, the phrase summons up the image of a perfectly coifed woman getting a mani-pedi while reading a magazine.
Over ... more
Writing retreat, tiny hot tub, in the rain, Guerneville, Ca, February 2014
After going on two self-led writing retreats in the last two months, I have decided that all moms need retreats.
The time and space to pursue what it is that you want to pursue - even if it's just lying in a hammock staring up at the sky - is an invaluable antidote to the reality of motherhood, that busy hubbub crowded with so many different peoples' desires.
In February, I went to Guerneville with a writer friend. It rained ... more
One of many green smoothies
I am doing the Clean cleanse this month. I did 6 days of pre-cleanse following the program's strict elimination diet. Now I'm on Day 14 out of 21 days of the cleanse, and afterward I will do a reintroduction period, bringing back restricted foods slowly so I can gauge if I have a reaction to any of them (please, not to wheat/gluten!). Despite having a work trip during week 2, Mikhail has been bravely following the program too.
Funny how it seems like suddenly "cleansing" ... more
Babu & Nubbins, New Year's Eve 2012-13
Two summers ago, I went offline for a week.
Last spring, I went offline for 2 weeks. That was when we were in Costa Rica, so it was fairly easy. (I did make an exception for sending a few emails to my pediatrician-father when Emry spiked a high fever, and for using a web calculator to translate Celsius to Fahrenheit - that's what technology is for after all). But no blogs. No online news. No Facebook or mindless, late-night website-hopping. No laptop, in ... more
Pantry after badly needed clean-up, February 2013
I have felt such a need to purge and clear out lately. What is this, some kind of early-early spring cleaning clock?
I think it's more that the build up over the 4 and a half years we've lived in this house has suddenly... well, built up. To the point where, when I peek into certain closets, I feel like an ant contemplating the scale of a skyscraper, and so I close the curtain on it and go about my business. No, it's not ... more
My little birdies in a nest, January 2013
I know part of being a human is having interactions, shall we say, with some of the less-desirable organisms that exist. Part of our role in this world is being a host to other creatures. I get that, biologically.
You probably think I'm talking about lice. I'm not. Though I live in fear of those little buggers every time I (infrequently) wash Elan's hair in the bath and spend 10 minutes combing through it, reassuring myself that the little flakes on the comb ... more
Purple flower, August 2012
"Regardless of what fashion arbiters would have you believe, time is not the enemy of women. It is a filter. It is a fine-mesh screen that day by day, year by year, filters out the muck of insecurity and self-doubt. Time is a purification system that has made me wiser, freer, better, some say sexier. Are those the actions of an enemy?"
I turned 37 this month. Maybe it's from losing the last of the "baby weight" over the past 6 months, maybe it's the inevitable result of ... more
Tree against sky, December 2012
It is 6:30 p.m., witching hour in my house. I am frustrated. Tired of the whine fuss complain tattle cycle my kids are locked in. The text messages from my husband keep pushing back his arrival time 10 minutes by 10 minutes. I find myself saying things like You guys are driving me totally nuts and I can’t hear myself think, as I attempt to keep them occupied while making dinner and then to eat what I’ve made.
Finally I reach my limit, my wavering line ... more
Rainy day beach sunset, December 2012
Happy 2013!
Mikhail and I did something truly shocking on New Year's Eve: we went to bed before midnight. Since we regularly stay up till midnight or later, often regretting it when one of our human alarm clocks go off at 6 a.m., we decided to be truly radical on New Year's Eve and not stay up.
This holiday time is about rest, restoration and rejuvenation for me.
Matching alpaca slippers, December 2012
Getting well.
Going for my first run in a month.
Family time and beach time.
I really, ... more
Muir Woods, Winter Solstice 2010
I’ve got too much to do and too little time to do it.
Does that sound familiar?
I keep finding myself thinking these days how do people do this? Specifically, how do women do this? How do mothers do this? How do we keep all these balls in the air simultaneously? Talk about juggling. Life these days feels like juggling while balanced on one foot on one of those semi-circle exercise balls they have at the gym, while drinking a cup of coffee and changing a diaper.
Finding ... more